Beginner's Guide to the Bundesliga

Are you new to Germany and missing your local sports team back home? Are you looking for something local you can follow here? Look no further than the German Bundesliga. In Germany Fussball tops every other sport. They have the highest average stadium attendance worldwide! And just so there is no confusion, for the rest of this post I'll be referring to Fussball as football. The NFL in Germany is usually referred to as American football.

The football season in Germany runs from August until May every year and the first league consists of 18 teams. First thing you may have noticed was the term 'first league'. If you come from North America and are unfamiliar with the European relegation sports model, here's a quick break down.

Most sports in Europe are made up of several leagues stacked on top of one another. They all use a promotion/relegation system to reward performance. This means the worst couple of teams in the first league are relegated down to the second league at the end of the season. While at the same time the best teams from the second league are promoted to the first league to replace those who were relegated. This process is repeated all the way down to the amateur leagues.

In Germany, the two teams with the poorest record in the first league trade places with the two teams with the best record in the second league. The third worst in the first league and third best from the second league play each other in a two game play off series at the end of the season for the right to play in the first league. This is called The Relegation Match.

Another thing unique to Germany is that the football clubs are exactly that. They are sport clubs. There is a rule in the German Football Association stating that club members must have a majority stake in the club. This is known as the 50+1 rule. It's to prevent Russian billionaires or Arab princes from buying up German football clubs and doing as they please with them. Anyone can become a member by filling out a form and paying a small yearly fee.

Now if you're thinking of just turning on the TV to check out a couple games, I'm afraid you'll be out of luck. To watch Bundesliga in Germany you'll have to order specific packages from Sky in order to watch the games. This a lot different from North America where all the major sports leagues are shown on basic cable. If you not sure about television packages, check out this post about TV and entertainment in Germany. If you really don't feel like spending the cash on pricey TV packages you can also find a local pub or restaurant that has Sky. They'll show the games live.

As with most sports though, the best way to enjoy the Bundesliga is live in the stadium. Unlike North America tickets here are sold directly through the club and not via a central ticketing company like Ticketmaster. They can range anywhere from 30-60 Eruos. Premium seats can be as expensive as 90 Euros. Tickets for the more popular clubs like Bayern or Dortmund can be pretty hard to come by. This is because tickets are made available to club members before they are made available to the general public. It's a way of ensuring that the stadiums are filled with actual fans rather than just tourists.

If you manage to get your hands on some tickets, you'll notice some key differences compared to your North American sports experience. First one being, the away fans are segregated from the home fans. This is for security reasons. It also provides the away team with their own cheering section. As a general rule, teams must reserve 10% of their capacity for away fans. The next thing is that the fans are pretty loud. The fans are an active part of the team. They sing songs, perform choreography and in some cases light off fireworks (though this is prohibited in Germany, it is still a pretty common sight.). I often find myself watching the fans more than the game.

Perhaps you're thinking about going but you're still a little reluctant because you've heard stories about violent football hooligans. I can tell you from personal experience that this is pretty much a nonissue for the everyday fan. The first thing you'll notice when you go to a match is the overwhelming police presence. At any given Bundesliga match there will be 200-300 police in full riot gear. If it's a high risk match like Schalke vs Dortmund that number could be doubled. They take security at football matches very seriously.

The one downside to German football is its competitiveness. Although the quality is quite good, the fact remains that Bayern Munich win almost everything. I've been living in Germany since October 2012 and I have never seen another champion other than Bayern. It does get a little tiresome watching Bayern win everything but hopefully that will change soon. That fan experience and football culture is what keeps me coming back. So go join a football pool or just catch some games with some friends on the weekend. It's a great way to connect with the locals and makes for great fun. See you at the match!

Driving in Germany

So you're in Germany and you've decided you want to buy a car and start driving. Great! There are a few things you'll need to get sorted out first. The first one being your Driver's License.

If you come from Canada, Australia, New Zealand or any one of a whole list of countries, you'll be able to swap your home license for a German one. As for the USA, depending on what state your license is from, you may have to take the theory test. Below is a link to a PDF fact sheet for holders of a foreign driving license outside of the EU.

Fact sheet for holders of foreign driving licences from states outside the European Union and the European Economic Area on driving licence provisions in the Federal Republic of Germany

Now that you got that all sorted, you need to get some wheels. There are a few routes you can take. If you're not ready to fully commit to buying a car you can sign up for one of many car sharing programs. Car2go is fairly popular. They have an English website and are pretty wide spread.
These work pretty well if you live in a large urban centre like Berlin or Cologne. Not such a great option if you live in a small Bavarian village.

If car sharing doesn't work for you and you want to buy a car then you'll need to know a few things. Buying a car in Germany is a tricky process. Throw in a language barrier and it can be a pretty stressful ordeal. Buying from a reputable dealership is probably your safest option. Because they're trying to sell you something. They'll usually bend over backwards to bridge the language gap. A pattern I've come to notice in Germany. You want something from them? "Speak German!" They want something from you? "Of course I can speak English!" If you're in the Düsseldorf area, Jenna from Life in Düsseldorf has a great article on where to buy used cars in Düsseldorf. Check it out.

Used Car Websites in Dusseldorf

Once you've bought a car you'll then have to make sure it has been inspected, insure it and register it. Usually in that order. The HU/AU inspection (TÜV) is something all cars need to have if they are considered road worthy. New cars will need to be inspected after three years and then every two years after that. Without this certification your car will be not allowed on the road. Once you know the car has been inspected you can go ahead buy some insurance. You need to buy insurance before you register your car. You can buy car insurance online and print out all the necessary documents at home. Once you have your proof of insurance you can then register the car and take it home. If you're buying off of a car lot, then they'll be able to do most of it there with you. If you're buying from a private person then you'll have to take care of it yourself. To register you'll have to seek out your closest 'Kfz Zulassungsstelle'.

Now it's time to drive right? Couple of points to note before you start flying down the Autobahn at 200kmh.

• Contrary to popular belief the highway system in Germany has speed limits. Although some stretches have no speed limit, many parts do. They can also change with the traffic conditions.
• 4 way stop procedure is different in Germany. It's always right before left, meaning the vehicle on the right has the right of way. 
• Watch out for cameras. Speed cameras are everywhere.
• If you're from Canada or the USA you'll notice that the streets are a lot narrower. Drive carefully.
• Some traffic signs are different here. Take the time to learn them. Here's a cheat sheet below.

So now you should be all set. Europe is a great place to road trip in. Within a couple of hours you can be in a completely different country with a completely different culture. Taking a road trip to Spain or Italy is absolutely doable and is one of the funnest ways to see Europe. So happy road tripping and drive safe everyone.

Telling Time in German

Telling time is pretty much the same in all languages right? Wrong. It can get pretty confusing for English speakers and can even result in a few missed appointments. Even though Germans use the 24 hour clock, things get a little confusing when you start getting into the fractions. Hopefully this short post will clear things up a bit.

A very crucial point to take note of is half past. They don't use half past. They always use half to. So when someone says "Wir treffen uns um halb vier." or "Let's meet at half four." They really mean 3:30 and not 4:30. English speakers will instinctively think 4:30 and that can lead to missed meetings or appointments.

I should also mention that this is the High German way of telling time. Once you get into Bavaria and Austria things get really messed up with 'three quarters after' and 'five after three quarters to'. If you stick to the table above, you'll be fine. Also, when in doubt, just use the full numerical time (Sixteen forty-five, nine twenty-two). It's less common but people will understand.

I hope you found this post helpful. Keep checking back for more tips.

Der, Die, Das. Shortcuts to Learning Articles.

The article is one of the trickiest parts of learning German. You can live here and speak the language for decades and still mess them up from time to time. It's not a big deal, but the better you are with your articles, the better your German will sound. I'm going to give you some shortcuts to help you with learning articles. And learn them you must! Learn a new noun? Memorise the article. It's not just Tisch (Table). It's der Tisch. It's not Auto (Car). It's das Auto. Also remember that in German all nouns are capitalised. Always. So. Let's get started.

German nouns are broken down into three genders:

• Masculine = Der
• Feminine = Die
• Neutral = Das

At first it may seem confusing but there is a method to determining the gender of a word. It has partly to do with what the object is, and partly to do with the way the word is spelled. I dug these tips out of an old German grammar text book* for you. Enjoy

Masculine (Der)

• Words ending with: -ant, -ast, -ich, -ig, -ismus, -ling, -or, -us
• Male persons or animals.
• Seasons, months, days of the week.
• Points on a compass and types of weather.
• Rocks and minerals.
• Alcoholic drinks (except beer) and plant based drinks.
• Makes of cars.
• Most rivers outside of Germany except for those ending in a vowel.
• Monetary units except for the pound and the mark.
• Mountains and mountain ranges with a few exceptions.

Feminine (Die)

• Words ending with: -a, -anz, -enz, -ei, -heit/keit, -ie, -ik, -in, -scaft, -sion/tion, -tät, -ung, -ur
• Female persons or animals.
• Aeroplanes, motorbike and ship names
• Most native German rivers. (including Swiss and Austrian rivers)
• Names of numerals.

Neutral (Das)

• Words ending with: -chen, -lein, -ma, -tel, -tum, -um
• Young persons and animals.
• Metals and chemical elements.
• Scientific units.
• Letters of the alphabet.
• Names of hotels, cafes, restaurants and cinemas.
• Most names of continents, countries, provinces and towns.

                                                                                         *Hammer's German Grammar and Usage 5th Edition

It's important to remember that there are no hard and fast rules when it comes to grammar. There are always a few exceptions. Try to think of them as guidelines. Also, try not to let it bother you if it seems overwhelming. Learning this stuff from scratch is much more difficult than simply memorising it from childhood (which is how German native speakers learn German). It's not your native tongue. You're allowed to make mistakes.

Other useful tools I discovered are German quiz apps. There are loads of them available for free for android and apple. If you have five extra minutes you can take a quick quiz and brush up on your articles.

So I hope these tips come in handy. If you can think of any exceptions, just add them to the comment section. Thanks for reading.

Administrative Hurdles

German bureaucracy is a challenge to navigate on the best of days. And that's if you speak German. For English speakers who are new to the country, it can be a nightmare. Hopefully this post will shed some light on the subject and point you in the right direction.

What is the best tip I can give you when dealing with these matters? If you can, bring a German speaking friend with you to help translate. This can save a lot of headaches. Although many Germans can speak English quite well, many will downright refuse to conduct these matters in any language other than German. It's mostly to protect themselves. They simply can't risk translating something wrong or having a misunderstanding. If you bring someone with you, it lessens the chance of a misunderstanding.

First Things First, Register.

All cities have offices called Burgerburo. No it's not the office for hamburgers but in fact the citizens office. This is where Germans go to get their ID cards, passports and of course to register their address. Now you can stay in Germany legally for up to three months without registering, but I recommend getting it out of the way as soon as possible. Once you're registered, it will make everything else a lot easier. In the bigger cities you will need to make an appointment. In the smaller towns you can just walk in and take a number. If you're new to the city they might even give you a small welcome package.

Next. Get a Bank Account

There are many options here. You'cant really go too wrong. Sparkasse is the biggest. They have branches everywhere and are pretty reliable. The other big banks are also ok. Check out their offers. Some will give you a starting bonus of 50 euros or something similar. I had a friend come with me the first week I was in Germany. I was not registered and did not have a job. Still I had no problems.

Another option is to go completely online. I don't have much experience in this area but below are a couple links to articles about the digital bank N26 and digital banking all together.

N26
Online Banks are Winning

While we are on the topic of banks, I feel it important to mention that everything here is done via electronic bank transfer. All of your bills, rent, everything is paid this way. To make and receive transfers you will need to know your IBAN. IBAN is a 22 digit number beginning with 'DE' and can be found on your bank card.

Health Insurance

This is a tricky one. Now if you are already in Germany then you probably had to prove that you are insured against medical emergencies. Usually a good travel insurance package should suffice. That's what I did and my original visa was approved with no problems. Essentially, if you are unemployed and end up in the hospital, the Germans won't have to pick up the tab. 

Once you get a job however, things will change. If you are making more than 450 euros a month then you'll be required to enter into the German public health care system and you will have to choose a provider. To be honest there isn't much difference between the providers. The provider you are with makes zero difference when you are going to the doctor, dentist or hospital. They might vary a bit when it comes to customer service or special deals on fitness training but that's about it. Once you've chosen a provider then your HR department should be able to set it all up for you. At least that's how it was with me. If you do indeed have to pay a visit to your provider's office then be sure to bring your German friend and all of your documents. 

Now for some basic facts about the German health care system.

• The total cost is about 17-18% of your gross earnings.
• The employer pays half so your share ends up being between 8-9%.
• You are free to choose any doctor you like.
• When you are sick, go to the doctor, they will write a note and you can stay home with pay.
• There is no limit to the number of sick days.
• Prescriptions cost 5 euros. Some are even free if they have a deal with the provider.
• Visits to the dentist are also included. 

Employment Contracts

Every job in Germany comes with a written contract. This is because German labour law is pretty rock solid. So employers will hire you on a one or two year contract so they have an out if things don't work out. They can also build in custom probation periods and other clauses. However, employers can only renew your contract a maximum of two times before they are required to give you an open ended contract. So take the following example. You're hired on a one year contract. The year is up and they decide they would like to keep you. They can give you another one year contract. Now after that year is up and they still want to keep you, they are not allowed to put term limits on the contract. You will receive the holy grail of work contracts, The 'unbefristeter Arbeitsvertrag' or unlimited work contract. This is the highest level of job security you can have in Germany. 

Minimum wage in Germany is 8.84 euros per hour. Almost everywhere in Germany you get paid once at the end of the month. Minimum number of paid vacation days are 24 if you work a 5 day week. There are special bonuses for working evenings, weekends and bank holidays. Make sure you're getting paid what's owed to you.

So hopefully you're now a little better equipped to navigate your way through the jungle of German red tape out there. I summarised these facts for you as a rough guideline. Some of the numbers can be off or vary from state to state. Any questions, just leave a comment below. Check back for more posts later. Thanks for reading. Come back soon!

TV, Film and Sports

Welcome to Germany! The TV here sucks. Apart from a couple of cool game shows, television here is mostly made up of bad reality shows, cheesy soap operas and badly dubbed American sitcoms. In my opinion, the poor quality of television is one of the biggest reasons why Germans are such active, friendly and social people. What they are not, is a nation of couch potatoes who spend their evenings in front of the TV. Regardless, sometimes we just want to plop down in front of the TV and soak up a small dose of comfort in the form of your favourite TV series or films. In this post I'll try to break down the entertainment options out there for us English speakers.

Basic TV

Television works like this in Germany. Everyone has access to the "Free TV" basic cable package. Don't let the name fool you. It's not free. Everyone has to pay the GEZ tax/fee to have access to the television, internet and phone networks. It costs about 17 euros a month. this fee is paid to the state and only grants you access. For internet and phone you have to then purchase a package from a service provider. Basic television however does not need to be purchased from a service provider. Provided you have a modern television with a built in digital receiver, you can access basic German television. Congratulations! You can now watch hours upon hours of German dubbed versions of The Big Bang Theory and The Simpsons.

Premium TV

If you come from Canada or America you're probably wondering about premium packages and DVR receivers. Sky, Unity Media and Telekom are the biggest providers. They all have access to the same bundle of channels but Sky has a few of its own premium channels. Most of these premium channels can be switched to English mode so you can hear the original version (FOX, TNT, National Geographic, etc.).

Sky is also where you'll find all the top HBO programs and of course the German Bundesliga. You can purchase bundled packages with internet and phone through Unity Media or Telekom and add Sky as an add-on or just purchase all of your television directly through Sky. Keep in mind though that Sky does not offer high speed internet or telephone. They are just a cable TV company.

The prices compared to Canada and America are pretty reasonable. Back in Canada an average premium TV & internet bundle will run you $188 a month on average. Here you can get the same thing for around 90 euros a month. Most German families still think that is far too much to spend on TV.

Streaming Services

Welcome to the 21st century! Cable bundles or slowly dying out and being replaced by streaming services. It's no wonder. Streaming services like Netflix provide tons of content for a fraction of the price. On top of that, everything is in English!

Amazon Prime is also gaining lots of popularity but a lot of the older movies are only offered in German. I'm not sure if this is a licensing issue, but it would be nice to see them offer German and English versions. All of their original content however is offered in English.

Another streaming service that seems to be gaining traction is DAZN. It's been marketed as the Netflix for sports. They are quickly buying up the rights to show all sorts of leagues and sports. If you're a college football fan or a baseball fan or an NHL fan then this is definitely for you. Check their site for updates. They're adding new content fairly frequently.

Internet Grey Area

Proceed at your own risk. When it comes to illegal streaming or downloading you can find yourself in a lot of trouble real fast in Germany. Germany is not very liberal when it comes to internet freedom and they are staunch protectors of intellectual property. This is the reason why you can still buy physical CDs and DVDs here in Germany.

I have been personally burned by these laws. I was using BitTorrent when I first moved here. Not too long after, the man who's name was on the internet account got sued. He was not too pleased and I had to pay 1500 euros in damages. This was because I was uploading while I was downloading. This is something that can't be avoided with BitTorrent. After this fiasco, I decided to just stay on the right side of the law. After all, people put a lot of effort into creating their art. The least we can do is pay for it.

VPNs are another legal grey area. It's not really illegal but you are essentially lying about your location to gain access to content otherwise not available in Germany. I used to use a VPN service with my Netflix account but Netflix has since put measures in place to make it pretty much impossible to use a VPN. Personally I think it's something they used to turn a blind eye to until the movie studios started complaining. VPNs are not really worth using anymore.

As for illegal streaming, I haven't read about people getting sued for it yet. There are a lot of options out there. We've all streamed something from a shady website before. Personally I find it annoying and it reeks havoc on your computer. These sites are loaded with malware and viruses. A lot of people are using Kodi. If that's your thing then go for it. Just be warned. Germany is always looking to go after people for taking free stuff from the internet.

The Cinema 

Nearly all of the films in all of the cinemas are dubbed in German. Makes sense. We are in Germany. Have no fear though. There is a market out there for Original Version films. OV for short. Your options might be a little more limited when it comes to showtimes and 3D options but it's nice to be able to see films in OV. As far as I know, the large cinema chain UCI doesn't show OV flims. Cinestar and Cinemaxx do however have a nice selection on OV films. They have locations all over Germany. Check out their sites for showtimes. Everything will be listed under 'Programm'.

So I hope you found this information useful. Hopefully now you'll be better equipped to navigate Germany's digital and entertainment landscape. If you have any questions just leave a comment below. Thanks for reading.

Learning German 101

So you've decided to move to Germany. Maybe for one year, or maybe forever. The point is you will have to learn the language, or at least some of it. Learning a second language as an adult is a daunting task. It will consume nearly all of your waking moments and even some of your dreaming ones. They don't call it immersion for nothing. It can be incredibly rewarding, and yet sometimes impossibly frustrating. Becoming self sufficient in German, I feel, is one of my greatest accomplishments in life.

I moved to Germany in 2012 around the same time as another guy. Former FC Barcelona trainer Pep Guardiola. He had just been hired by FC Bayern and, like me, he had to learn German. This gave me an interesting perspective. No matter how much money you have, there are no shortcuts when it comes to learning a language. Sure he had private tutors, but he still had to put in the work in everyday. In this one aspect, I felt we were almost equals. Both of us, just two guys trying to learn a new language.

I can't really teach you German in a short blog post. I can however give you some tips to make the process go faster.

Tip 1:
Practice Makes Perfect.

This might seem like a no-brainer, but it is the fastest way to learn. Practice practice practice. Make mistakes. Don't worry about sounding stupid. When learning a language you are going to make mistakes. The more mistakes you make, the faster you'll learn. Keep in mind that this is also the German way of learning. Germans love practising their English. They will practice every chance they get. It makes things easy sometimes for new comers but it can also develop into a crutch. You might have to force the conversation back to German once in a while. The ideal situation is when you can make friends who don't speak English. This makes staying in one language easier. You may not realise this, but the language you build your relationships on will most likely be the language you stay with. It's pretty hard to switch languages after you've already built a friendship in another language. Patience is also key. It takes a while before you build up a vocabulary large enough to hold even the simplest of conversations. Try to order food and drinks in German. Don't take ii personally if they respond in English. I know it feels like a failure but they're most likely just trying to make you feel comfortable.

Tip 2:
Read and Write

Writing is easier than speaking because you can always correct yourself. You might miss things when you listen to someone speak but you can read the same sentence over and over a hundred times. Read and write as much as you can. A tip my wife gave me was to read newspaper and magazine articles, highlight the words I didn't understand and write them down in a book along with the translation. This is something her mother used to do when she first moved to Germany from Poland. This was an incredible exercise to help me build my vocabulary. Another great exercise was writing a German journal. I would write it and my wife would correct it. You will also notice that if you take a German course, there will be a lot of letter writing. Trust the Germans. They know how to teach and learn languages.

Tip 3:
Learn a Noun, Learn the Article

This rule can't be stressed enough. I wish someone would have given me this tip before I started learning German. It makes things so much easier down the road. The article is the German version of 'The'. In German they have 'Der' 'Die' 'Das'. In English we just have 'The'. When you get into more advanced German, articles get more complicated. Memorising articles is a must. I plan on writing an entire post later just on learning articles but here are a few tricks to start you off.

• Anything ending in 'chen' or 'lein' is always 'Das'
• Most nouns ending in 'ung' or ' keit' are usually 'Die'
• Seasons and days of the week are 'Der'

Tip 4:
Avoid Swearing and Dirty Jokes

Someone once told me the hardest thing to learn in a language is how to swear properly and how to tell jokes. Different swear words carry different weights in different languages. It is very easy to slip up and use the wrong word in the wrong situation. It requires a fair amount of nuance and fine manoeuvring to tell a good joke even in your native tongue. Trying this in a second language can have disastrous consequences. The safe option is just to avoid them all together.

So I hope these tips help. I plan on writing more detailed posts on specific language topics. If there is anything you need help with, please leave a comment or just email me directly. And remember, it's supposed to be fun. So enjoy yourself!